OH HEY, MANTI

Holy cow. Satan is so real. And he is using every once of power that he has to lead us away from the Gospel. But the Lord will always have more power than him & will run to our aid whenever we need it.

These last few weeks have been crazy-- and not like crazy busy, but like crazy emotional. I feel like I'm on a roller coaster, some days I'm so excited & can't stop talking about my mission, but other days I dread going on because I feel so unprepared & unworthy.

I know that every missionary goes through this. I know I'm not alone with my feelings. & I know that all of these doubts are coming from Satan. The Lord would never want one of his children to feel like they aren't good enough or worthy for His blessings.

Satan is trying with all of his might to keep us from preaching the Gospel-- BECAUSE HE KNOWS IT'S TRUE & he knows the power that the Holy Spirit has to bear witness of the truthfulness of the Gospel.

I have been preparing to enter the temple for the last month or so & I have been slightly (ok way more than just slightly) been freaking out. I felt like my testimony wasn't strong enough & I wasn't pure enough to enter into the Lord's House.

I had my temple recommend interview on Sunday & I knew that before then I needed to decide if I was ready. So I drove to the St George Temple & just read my scriptures, prayed, & begged the Lord to show me that I am ready. I didn't get my answer that night though, so going into church the next day I was terrified. But I had my Bishop's interview & I felt fine, then I had my interview by the Stake President & that's when I got my answer.

(this is the St George Temple btw)

As he was asking the standard worthiness questions I felt the spirit so strongly that I started to tear up. I never (like seriously ever) cry in front of other people, so this was so crazy to me & I got so embarrassed at first.

Then he offered to teach me some important things about the temple & wow. Going through the temple is so special & with it comes so many blessings. I left my interview with him with an even firmer testimony of temples & an overwhelming desire to enter the Lord's house.

SO HERE I AM. Sitting in a hotel room just outside of Manti, UT with my parents, waiting to go through the temple in less than  24 hours. (holy cow!!!)

THE CHURCH IS TRUE

I'm seriously the most indecisive person on the planet. I changed my mind a million times before choosing to go to byu. I haven't even decided on a major yet because there are too many options. I even have a hard time choosing what to eat every morning for breakfast. But one thing I know for sure is that I'm supposed to serve a mission & that people in England are waiting for me. 

The church is true. Even in the hardest times the gospel is the one thing that never fails to bring me happiness, peace, & joy. How could I not share something so amazing?

The Lord loves us & he wants us to be happy. That's why he restored the gospel & is making it possible to send out so many missionaries. He wants everyone to have the chance to accept the gospel & we are helping him accomplish that. 

Wow okay sorry I just kinda needed to write down all my feelings. 

I MOVED

There were a lot of decisions I had to make after I decided to serve a mission. One of the hardest decisions I had to make was whether or not I would move home or continue my education in Provo. After a lot of prayer I decided that what was best for me was to move home & be with my family for the last few months leading up to my mission. 

Finally making this decision was definitely bittersweet. I love my family & I knew that I'm going to have an extremely hard time leaving them when I fly to England, but I also loved my roommates and friends in college. 

I had finally started to make friends in my ward. I was becoming comfortable with all of my roommates. Plus Morgan and Kendall had definitely become two of the best friends I have ever had. 

Even though I knew my social life would pretty much not exist when I moved, I knew that being home with my family was where the Lord needed me. So last Friday, February 27th, I packed up my car & moved home. 

So I'm back in good old St George until May 27th, when I board an airplane to England. 

sidenote: Wow I am so blessed. Not everyone is lucky enough to have such a supportive family & group of friends. Honestly the Lord has blessed me in too many ways to count.